Misteri Hantu Londho

" Om, besok anter aku ke kraton sama taman sari, sama musium kereta ya om! " Omonge gendis
" Oke! "
Isuke aku ngejak si P, tak kon ngancani aku
" Pe kancani aku ngetutke cah cah abg yo! "
" Oke siap!, ono madang e to? "
" Utekmu isine ming untalan tok, yo jelas ono lah! "

 
Singkat cerita tenan ngeterke jalan jalan neng , musium andong, taman sari trus kraton..
lha bareng tekanan kraton lur.. Aku ora sengaja weruh kahanan sing nganeh anehi. Ana landha wedok, isih enom ayu rupane , kaya boneka berby ning ditutke londho lanang, wes wujud badan alus. Deknen mlaku nengendi wae ditutke terus.

 
" Ngopo e kung, kok malah ngalamun? " Takone si P
" Kui lho pe..!, ana landha! "
" Hanjur kon ngapakke?, wong og gumunan ming weruh turis luar negri we gumun " Jare si P
" Ora perkoro kui, londho wedok kae ditutke demit! "
" Hass.. Mbok ra meden medeni to kowe kung! "
" Ora meden medeni, aku ki ming gumun, demit londo kok nganti tekan kene! "
" Asss.. Rasah digagas!, kae lho ponakanmu wes tekan kono, jare arep jalan jalan neng malioboro ! " Omonge si P
" Wah iso semplok sikilku, nek ngetutke cah cah kae! "
" Hayo piye meneh, wes gek ndang, selak ilang bocahe! " Omonge si P

Akhire tekan Malioboro, mlaku hedeehh.. Nganti dengkelen sikile.
Ngetutke abg milih milih barang neng kaki lima.
Lha kok kepetuk londone mau meneh.

 
" excuse me i want to pass ! " Omonge demit londho
Ora sengaja aku mesem karo deknen.
" can you see me ? " Omonge londone
Gandeng aku ora mudeng basane aku ming meneng wae.
" I beg you please tell me that you can see me!" Omonge demit londo lanang
" Pe.. kowe isa basa Inggris ora? " Takonku
" Aneh aneh kowe ki kuung, kung!, mangan sekolahan we ora kon boso Inggris! "
" Lha iki demit e ngejak omong aku ra mudeng je! "
" Hasss ono ono wae, dijawab wae oh yes oh no croot.. Ngono wae! "
" Ndasmu! "
" I'm sure if you can see me, please help me!" londone muni meneh
Gandeng ora ngerti artine aku ming mantuk mantuk
" Thank God I was able to find you, that woman is my fiancé, please tell me that I am beside her. He doesn't know that I'm dead! "
" Pe.. Londone muni teng got teng got ngono kui, maksude apa ya? "
" Asembuh kuung!, paling londone modar kecemplung got! " Jare si P
" Yes.. Yu, apa modar kecemplung got? " Takonku nganggo basa Inggris
"what are you saying?, I don't understand.
please tell that fiancé of mine, who is standing there… that jhon is by his side! "
" Asuii..!, ngomongmu gedawan aku ora mudeng cuk! " omongku

 
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Tak bacutke cerita perndobosanku ya lur.
Gandeng aku ora mudeng basane, demit londho ne tak tinggal, dasare ponakanku yo njaluk bali, wes kesel jare, teruske sesok.!
Telung ndina lur.. Bladegan ngetutke si Gendis karo kancane jalan jalan , neng Borobudur, prambanan terakhir neng pantai.
Singkat cerita, bareng wes do bali suasana omahku mbalik sepi meneh. Dina sak banjure ming tak nggo turu. Ojo maido lho lur..!, ambak ambak ming ngetutke awake koyo dipruk pruk..
Isuk tangi turu awake wes seger, biasa lur, njikuk banyu suci perwita sari trus manembah marang Gusti sing akarya jagad. Subuhan
Barkui, nggodog banyu karo ngliwet sega . Biasa lur.. Kerjaan pria karir sehari hari. Mengko jangan karo lawuhe tuku matengan wae neng warung bu Dukuh limangewu wes entuk akeh .

 
" Kuung..!, kuung! " Krungu suarane si P
" Ngopo e clok isuk isuk wes tekan kene? "
" Gelem rambutan ora kowe? "
" Isuk isuk og wes oleh rambutan bar maling seko ngendi e? "Takonku
" Ora yo..!, dikirimi dulure simak "
" Lha kok malah dikekne kene, seneni makmu mengko! "
" Iki malah seng akon simak je..! "
" Yowis kekne mburi kana..!, wis sarapan durung? "
" Hayo genah durung! "
" Kana tulung tukokno jangan, karo gorengan nggone bu Dukuh, nggo sarapan ! , mengko tak gawekne kopi!"
" Siap ! " Omonge si P trus bablas
" excuse me IS ANYONE INSIDE! " ono suoro neng lawang ngarep.
Gek bakul opo meneh iki isuk isuk wes nawani dagangan
" excuse me IS ANYONE INSIDE! "

 
Bareng tak delok... Elaaaah... Demit londo sing tau petuk neng Malioboro kae hedeeeh..
Deknen ketok seneng weruh rupaku
"Thank God I know that you can see me. Can you help me?"
Hedeeeh... Ajur.. Jummm.. Omong opo iki.. .
" Bakul bakmi?, sana.. Neng pinggir dalan sana, dodolnya nek mbengi..!, nek the saiki tutup! " omongku
"No..!, I just want to meet you, I beg you to help me!"
" Lha yo bakul bakmi to..!, disana.. disini tidak the dodol bakmi! " Omongku njelaske
"I don't know what you're talking about, I just want to meet you and ask for help!"
" Oalah... Kepeseng?, Yuuu..the kebelet ngising? ." Takonku
"Yes, I want your help! " Jare demit e
" Yess..?, nah.. Itu disitu ada the jeding, tempat the ngising.. Tlotok tlotok.. Trus.. Wik wik cawik.. ojo lali trus the grujug pakek banyu nanti ndak the mambu taii! " Omongku
" no I don't want to go to the toilet. I just want to meet you to help me! " Omonge landane karo tangane obah obah
" Loh.. Jare mau yes..!, kok dadi No ki piye to iki..?, ndak popo..!, saya kalau isuk, ya the ngising sik..! " Omongku njelaske mbok menowo isin barang.
"Thank you, I don't want to go to the toilet. I am very happy to meet people like you. I really hope for your help. I am very grateful to have met someone who can see me!" omonge landane
" Hedeeeh... Kowe ki ngomong opo to cuuuk...!, wes pokoke yes.. Wae lah...!, mbuh.. Arep ngising opo ora terserah..! " .
" Kowe ki ngopo to kung?, ngomong dewe koyo wong setres, iki jangan e! " Omonge si P
" Kui lho.. Demit londo, ngetutke tekan kene! "
" Sing neng Malioboro wingi kae? "
" Iyo..!, pingin weruh po? "
" Gaah..!, rasudi " Omonge si P
" Tinggal sarapan sik wae yo pee.. Mbang mumet aku! "
___________
Bar sarapan trus makan buah rambutan , jian koyo wong sigeh .

 
"What is the name of the fruit here?" Londone mulai omong meneh karo nunjuk rambutan
" Rambutan ki basa Inggris e apa pe? "
" The jembut! "
" COCOTEE...!, raono boso ingris kok jembut! "
" Kui landne kok ngerti ,ngetutke tekan kene yo? " Takone si P.
" Hayo embuh..!, takoni landane kono.. Mosok malah takon aku! "
" Maksudku coba ditakoni ngono kooong! "
" Asuog kowe ki, genah ra dong basane kon nakoni! "
" Koncone awakdewe mancing ono ora yo sing iso basa Inggris? " Takonku
" Raaak!, koncone dewe ki goblog kabeh! "
" Lha terus piye iki? "
" Mbok jajal takon wantinah tanggamu kui! " Jare si P
" Emang wantinah iso? " Takonku
" does not reduce your enjoyment of eating the fruit, while listening to my story "
" Sik to.. Ndo londoo..!, menengo sik!, agi tak golekke penerjemah! " Omongku
" Mungkin iso..!, wantinah kan tau dadi tki neng luar negri to? " Jare si P
" Oalah.. Iyo, kabare tau neng singgapur. Yowes undangan Rene si wantinah! "
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Ming tak dobosi we gelem moco, kok gumuuun akuuh . Yowes tak bacutke cerita per ndobosanku.
Ora suwe si wantinah njedul. Ngerti to lur karo si Wantinah iki?, alah.. Tonggo ngarep omah, mbokne Adit bojone si Tejo sing wonge bentuke kaya bak tandon banyu, mergo lemu .
" Ngopo e kung..!, nyelo nyelo, aku agi ngumbahi je..! "
" Nah.. Kowe mbiyen tau dadi TKW to..? " Takonku
" Iya, mbiyen, piye? " Jare wantinah
" Berarti kowe isa basa Inggris, sak ora orane mudeng? " Takonku
" Nek Inggris percakapan aku mudeng, ning nek kon nulis aku ora iso lho kung..!, mergane basa inggrisku ming kulinan ora merga sinau " Omonge wantinah.
" Oramasalah, sing penting isa! "
" Lha ngopo to lik? " Takone wantinah
" Iki ngene, ono wong londo , arep ngobrol, ning ngerti dewe aku ora mudeng, basa Inggris, dadi kowe sing tak kon nerjemahke "
" Oalah.. Isa aku kung, saiki landane nengendi? " Takone wantinah.
"Saiki kowe anteng, trus merem..! " Omongku
" Yoh manut " Omonge wantinah trus merem.
Mripate wantinah trus tak leletii kemandenku air Surgawi .
Tak kon merem mergane nek weruh ndak mencak mencak , galak e pol je wantinah ki, opo meneh nek karo bank plecit arep nagih.
Ora suwe jigongku wes mulai beraksi.

 
" Iki po kung landane? " Jare wantinah
" Lha yo kui.. "
" Ngganteng banget! " Jare wantinah kemayu
" Nek dibanding bojomu si Tejo yo Iyo, bojomu kae rupane koyo maling! " Omongku jujur
" Ora koyo asu po kung! " si P melu komentar
" Wes gek dijak ngobrol! " Akonku
" Hallo..! ,"
" ORASAH... KEMAYUU...!, MALAH TAK SLATAK NDASMU MENGKO! "
" MBOK SABAR TO KUUNG..! "
" Lha jeneh..ming muni Haloo we kloget kloget koyo uler keket! " Omongku
" can you see me too?" Omonge londone
" Yes, of course..! " Jare wantinah
" Wedyaaan iso tenan! " Jareku
" I am very grateful, coming to Indonesia, it turns out that there are many sacred people here! " Omonge landane
" Modar kowe Naah..!, omong opo kui? " Takonku
" in Indonesia too many beautiful people, like me! "Jare wantinah.
" Haha haha yes, of course.. ..! " Londone ngguyu
" Landane kok ngguyu?, ngrasani aku po kowe nah? " Takonku kepo
" Menengo sik to kung..!, mbang tak tapuk lambemu! " Jar Wantinah
" Wooh.. Wantinah nggleling.. Kemayu Naah nah..! " Si P melu komentar
"Introduce my name is Mrs. Wantinah, then this idiot-looking person's name is Mr. Kung, then this ugly-looking one has an unclear name. What's your name? Where are you from?" Omonge Wantinah
"My name is John Paul, I'm originally from England. But I've been living in America for a long time..!" Jare landane
" Asuog kowe nah, jebul isa basa Inggris tenan! " Omongku
" Dadi ngene kung, landane iki uwong seka Inggris, ning tinggal e neng Amerika. Deknen jenenge
Jhon Paul! "
" Oalah...!, halo jontorr..! "
" Jhon Paul..!, og jontor.. Hedehh..! "
" Lha terus karepe ngopo ngetutke aku? , ndang takokke! " Omongku
" Sik tak mikir sik..!, rada lali je aku, iki nek ono duite, yo trus cek cek kelingan! " Jare wantinah
" Dasar.. Moto duwiten! " Omonge si P
"By the way, what do you really need? Why did you come here?" Omonge wantinah
"Well, actually I want to ask you guys for help, my fiancé's name is CATRINA. Actually we wanted to get married last month, after we got married we planned to come to Indonesia for our honeymoon.
Our destination was Yogyakarta and Bali.
But unfortunately, an accident happened to me. me and.my friend went to climb the mountain, because we were careless we got lost and ended up dying from cold and running out of food.
Our bodies have not yet been found. thought I was Catetina, broke my promise. therefore I beg to explain to my fiancé. don't ever wait for me. and I.love her so much!" Jare landane
" Crito apaa kui landane, was wes wos was wes wos.. Ora mudeng aku! "
" Dadi ngene kung, iki yo ming kiro kiro lho.. Kan tak takoni, karepmu ngopo to kok ngetutke tekan kene? "
" Iyo bener..!, trus jawabe piye? " Takonku kepo
" Si jhon iki arep njaluk tulung, kon nyampekke karo tunangan e, jenenge Caterina. Deknen kui arep menikah, wanted get married lasd mouth ki maksude bentuk lampau... Sik sik.. Tak mikir sik, .. Oh dadi karepe kudune si John iki wes menikah karo si Caterina akhir bulan wingi, ning terjadi kecelakaan sing Caterina ora ngerti, sak durunge nikah si jhon iki mendaki gunung karo kancane, tersesat njur do mati merga kademen, karo kentekan pangan . Mongko bar nikah wes rencana arep bulan madu neng Indonesia, sing dipilih jogja karo bali. Naah gandeng si Caterina ora ngerti, deknen merasa kecewa karo si jhon iki, disangkane si jhon iki ingkar janji, kiro kiro ngono kung..! "
" Ming sik tak gumuni, deknen ki isih urip kok ngomonge wes mati yo? " Jare wantinah
Si P malah nyekekek, weruh wantinah bingung, deknen durung sadar sing dijak omong kui demit

--

Cerita sakdurunge, aku ditekani hantu landa sing jenenge Jhon Paul. Gandeng aku ora iso basa Inggris , aku njaluk tulung tanggaku si Wantinah tak kon nerjemahke.
Wantinah karo demit londo trus ngobrol, cas cis cus, was wes wos, fa fi fu, crat cret crooot.
Sing intine Jhon Paul iki arep njaluk tulung, kon ngandani Caterina tunangan, menawa si Jhon Paul iki wes mati . Nek kudune sasi wingi deknen ki wis menikah, trus bulan madu neng Indonesia. Mbok menawa tiket karo paspor wes gebacut disiapke mulai si Catrina mangkat neng Indonesia dewe.

 
" Coba nah..!, ditakoni, saiki si Caterina kui nginep e neng ngendi? " Akonku
"If I may know, where is Caterina staying now?" Omonge wantinah karo demit londo
"Right now, Caterina is staying at the Melia Purosani hotel. Let's go there now!" Jare landane
" Saiki si Caterina nginep neng hotel Melia Purosani, iki malah Jhon ngejak rana saiki! " Jare wantinah
" hotel e ngendi to kui? " Takonku
" Alah.... Hotel Melia Purosani og ra ngerti kowe ki wong ngendi e kung ? " Omonge si P
" Lambemuu..!, emang kowe ngerti? "
" Ngerti lah..!, cerak ringrud jalan Parangtritis! " Omonge si P
" Ok les go! " omongku nganggo bahasa Inggris melu melu wantinah
" Kowe melu lho Naah..!, aku ra ngerti basane! "
" Yoh tak salin sik! , Numpak apa? " Takone wantinah
" Motor lah, duwene motor og! "
" Lha aku piye? " Takone wantinah
" Hayo numpak motor dewe, kowe lak duwe motor to..!, Ha nek mbonceng aku, niat ambyar motorku! "
" Mbok ra ngenyek, ngono kui kung! " Omonge wantinah nggonduk
" Lha nyatane og nah.., motorku nek mbok tumpaki sok bekere iso kelet neng aspal! " Omongku
" Yowis aku tak nggo motor dewe..! "
" Kowe mengko mboncengke si Jhon, aku tak boncengan karo si P " Omongku
" Opo ora kualik kung, aku tak mbonceng mas Paul iki ning nganggo motorku! " Jare wantinah
" Haniat iso njengat motor e "
Singkat crito bablas mara neng hotel Melia Purosani.
Jebul sing neng jl parang tritis hotel rose in... Dudu Melia Purosani.
Cen bajingan og si P ki..
______

Bareng tekan hotel e.
" Kok suwe banget to kowe kung? " Takone wantinah sing wes ndisiki tekan
" Cen asuog si P ki..!, sok tau..! " Omongku ndongkol
Si P ming meneng wae tak onek onekke.
Hotel e gedhe.. Lur..!, tingkate okeh, apik ono kolam renang e .
Aku trus mlebu takon karo bakule hotel.
" Mbak.. Aku mau ketemu sama Caterina! "
" Caterina siapa ya pak? "
" Caterina londo! " Omongku
" Sebentar ya pak, tak carinya, silahkan ditunggu di loby depan! " Omonge bakule hotel
" Kung..!, kok cekeran to koe? " Takone wantinah
" Kae sandalku tak copot neng ngarep lawang! "
" Ndesa tenan og kowe..!, kene ki hotel yoo.. Dudu mesjid! " Jare wantinah
" Oleh dinggo po? " Takonku
" Yo oleh lah..! "
" Woo.. Si P ki cen asuog..!, jare mau kon nyopot ndak regret! "
" Akuu.. Meneeh..!, wong sing omong kon nyopot we kowe og!, sandale copot pe..ngisin isini ndak ketok nek ra tau saba hotel "
_____

Rada sauntaro ngenteni neng loby Hotel
" Nah..!, tulung takokke, karo si Jhon.. Nggowo duit ora?, mau bensinku meh entek je.. Aku lali ora nggowo duit .. Niat baline nyurung! " Omongku
" Mbok ngomong dewe..!, gah aku isin! " Jare wantinah
" Aku kan ora ngerti basane! "
" Tak kandani! " Jare wantinah trus mbisiki aku.
"Excuse me, can I pee in my pants?" Omongku nirokke omonge wantinah
"No..!, don't defecate in your pants, let me take you to the toilet!" Jare John Paul
" Artine apa kui nah? " Takonku
" Deknen ora duwe duit! "
" WUUU.. LONDO KERE..! "

---

Tak bacutkan cerita per ndopok an ku ya lur..!
CATERINA tunangan si John Paul, nginep neng hotel Melia Purosani.
" Kok suwi to mbak?, wes ketemu durung? " Takonku karo bakul e Hotel.
" Sudah pak..!, tunggu saja, beliau mau turun katanya. Apa mau saya buatkan kopi? " Takone bakule Hotel
" Gratis? " Takonku
" Iya Pak..!, servis Hotel! "
" Boleh lah..!, nek es krim nggak ada? " Takonku
" Nggak ada pak!, adanya kopi sama teh! "
" Yowis gak popo..!, ning gratis lho ya!" Omongku
" Iya! "

 
Ora suwe pelayan teka nggawa gelas karo tremos.
Bareng tak coba..

 
" Ha gene ming jarang panas!, jare mau kopi!, ngapusi tok!, pantesan gratis " Omongku
" Iki lho kuung..!, sing diwadahi kertas..!, iki lak ono tulisane to, iki kopi, iki teh, iki gulane..!, ndesa tenan og kowe kuung !, " Jare wantinah
" Berarti iki kon gawe dewe..!, Ora digawekke..! "
" Karepe..?, gratisan og aeng aeng! " Si P melu komentar.
"Excuse me, are you guys wanting to meet me?"

 
Ana landa wedok marani , ora pangling iki sing jenenge Caterina.

 
"Is your name Miss Caterina?" omonge Wantinah
Trus landa wedok mau yo genten ngomong
" yes.., that's right!, my name is Caterina!, how can I help you?" Omonge si Caterina trus ngejak salaman njur jagongan neng lobi.
"Actually our arrival here to meet you, just to take this man to meet you. This man said, you are his fiancé!, he claimed to be named John Paul" Omonge Wantinah
Si Caterina ketok kaget

 
"You know John?, where is he now?"
"That person is beside you, can't you see?" Omonge Wantinah bingung.
"Where?, I don't see him here!"
" Yo pee..!, awak dewe bali wae yo..! , ora mudeng do ngomong opo! " Omongku nggonduk .
" Sik to kung..!, aku kok bingung, mosok si Caterina iki ora weruh si John neng jejere ! " Jare Wantinah.
" Hayo jelas ora weruh lah, sik mbok jak ngobrol kui hantu! " Jare si P
" Hantu apa? "
" Hayo Hantune si Jhon Paul lah! "

 
Wantinah nyawang Hantune, trus...
Cekengkeng..!, koyo gajah kena setrum trus nggloso.. Mripate malik putih kabeh.. Nggletak semaput neng kursi. Hedehhh... Dadi geger..
Hiesss.. Cen biyangane og kowe pe..!, ndadak ngundang wong sak RT iki nggotong Wantinah..

" what's wrong with you? " Omonge Caterina bola bali hedehh..
" "Everyone please help her !"
Wong hotel do regudug nulungi wantinah.
" Kena apa ini pak? " Takone pegawe hotel
" Ndak papa..!, dia cuma ngelih aja! " Omongku
" Ndak papa..!, ndak usah panik, dia memang suka begitu.. Biasa punya penyakit ayan! " Omonge si P
" Eh mbak..! , kamu bisa bahasa Inggris ndak? " Takonku karo bakule Hotel
" Bisa pak! "
" Tolong bantu aku! "
" Bantu apa pak? "
" Tulung omongke karo si Caterina iki "
" Ok siap..! "
" Tulung omongke, yen pacare sing jenenge Jhon Paul ora isa teka neng pesta pernikahan merga deweke wes mati! "

 
Mbak mbake trus omong karo Caterina nganggo basa Inggris.
Si Caterina trus nyawang aku, karo mimbik mimbik trus luhe ndrejes metu seko pucuk mripat.

 
" Tulung omongke meneh, nek aku iso nemokke deknen, ning syarat e kudu manut karo aku, tapi kui nek ndeknen gelem lho! " Omongku

Bar diomongke, si Caterina nangis sesengrukan, nyawang aku karo mantuk mantuk, nandake nek setuju.

 
" Tulung omongke meneh, nek iki ora gratis, mbayar sak iklas e! " Omongku
" Jare tetulung kui kudu iklas kung! " Si P ajar omong
" Iki ora perkoro iklas, iki perkara bensin!, gelem po kowe tak kon nyurung?, trus gelem po kowe tak kon nggendong Wantinah tekan omah? "
" Hayo wegah! "
" Lha gene..!, rasah wewet..!, manut aku penak pokoke! "

Caterina trus ngetokke dompet, duite di kekne aku kabeh duit dolar , ana nek Ming 30 lembar, nilaine piro ora mudeng
Kaya biasane lur.. Mripate katerina tak leleti air surgawi..
Ora suwe terus..

 
" Jhon...!" , ..... Njur do pelukan tangis tangisaan.. Wes iso mbok bayangke dewe lah..
" Yo bali yo pe..!, tugas e dewe wes rampung, njur duit koyo ngene iki payu ra yo, nek nggo tuku bensin? "
"Hayo dijolke ndisik to ya kung!, aku ngerti nggone le ngijolke! "
" Angger mbok blasukke meneh awas kowe! "
" Ora oraa..!, percoyo aku! "

 
Mbak mbak e bakule hotel tak wenehi limang lembar, karo tak kon pesen mobil , dinggo nggawa bali wantinah . Motore wantinah tak kon nggowo si P.
___________
Sesuk e wantinah tak nei duit dolar
Kui iso nggo nglunasi utang bang plecitmu nah
Nuwun ya kung